Things I'm pondering

So I was reading a discussion on a forum about Mother/Daughter relationships.  And I don't have any daughters so I can't epistlize on that too much.  But I am a daughter of a mother and so I can talk about it from that perspective!  A lot of the daughters were saying how their mothers were needy or easily offended and they can't hold conversation with their mothers and they love their mothers but they've had to set boundaries for their mothers.  I don't want to be rude but since when do we treat our mothers like children?  If the mother really has issues why would you lower yourself to the same childish level in that relationship?  I know I'm not experienced in this...I suppose I sound silly even talking about it..... 
     So on to what I was really going to say.  I was going to say that I don't recall ever having to set boundaries for my mom!  That thought makes me cackle!  She set plenty for me though!  :)
     So but anyhow, I feel like I have a nice relationship with my mom.  And I think this is the reason.  Mom didn't have problems with her identity.  She wasn't trying to forever figure out who she was.  She was fine with herself.  She had an ongoing relationship with God.  She was secure in knowing that she was redeemed through Christ.  She reads alot...so she was always feeding her mind and learning and growing.  She crochets, she quilts, she does puzzles.  That's brain exercise and good for a brain!  She always stays busy.  She always told me that busy people are happy people.  I'm finding that true, when I watch my boys everyday....they love a good scheduled day.  And relationships...Mom always has friends.  When I was a young girl at home I remember that there were other women in the church who relied on Mom .  She was confidential and listened well.  But yet she didn't believe in silence...she still says it's not good to hide in silence.  She also always told me the self pity is the devils tool....Something I tell my sons now.
   So back to relationships.  After thinking about all that I'm coming to the conclusion once again that good healthy relationships are outlooking...by that I mean this.  Good relationships happen when a person knows who they are in Christ.  When a person is complete in Christ and not in looking at themselves and their insecurities but putting all their issues under the blood and learning from there.  And I think this is easier typed than done! 
     So when my three year old tells me I'm a bad mommy it doesn't make me crawl in a hole and wonder what I need to do different so he likes me.....I've been redeemed and I don't need his approval!  K did that the other day....looks at me and says"  You're a bad mommy" with a deep scowl on his face.  For some reason I can't help but laugh at the silly guy....he's so little and cute and naughty.....but his dad won't let him talk like that.
   Which brings me to the other thing I've been pondering.  My boys' dad. The last two nights he's been getting up to help me with the sick baby.  And he's the one who can get the baby back to sleep.  My efforts are pretty worthless lately in that department.  So Matt's been taking over.  And then he goes to work the next day and does PR work all day.   He's a pretty nice guy. I'm really thankful for him.  I found all our old dating letters and cards the other day.  :)  That was interesting what ten years does to a relationship....talking about relationships again! 
    So you tell me...what makes a good relationship?  Since relationships are so much a part of life.....
    And now it's time for me to get some work done.  My list today includes:  Cleaning the garage(That will take awhile).   Baking cookies for market and other market preparations.   Putting the laundry through.  And keeping my kids from tearing the house and yard apart...keeping them working. :)    
    And we're getting overnight guests...at least I think we are!  So I must air out the guest quarters! :)  prissy tone of voice.....