Life in Nebraska ....

Dear all our Friends, Merry Christmas! I wish I could say in words just how much Merry Christmas means to me. It means Jesus! It means Grace! It means Salvation! And it means time with family and friends and chocolate and coffee and snow. Oh and sometimes it means sending all our friends a note and a family picture. So a quick run down of 2018 and our kids and our lives: We're still living at the blue house on the corner of A street and 336 th road. We still feel like our seven acres is a little corner of heaven on earth. We have a horse and a pony and a dog and so many cats(almost all wild). A new thing this year is sending all three boys down the road to the church school. It's been a bit of a learning curve but what's life without a bit of learning curve? Zerrick is 15 and doing high school and youth stuff. His hobbies are reading, hunting, hockey and time with his friends. Keagan is 11 and still tearing everything apart or d...

I should let the pictures speak for themselves.  I love my kids so much it hurts.  Their little hearts and their big hearts have to learn to sort through all the things in life.  Watching them I wonder if I am giving them the tools and courage for it.  But in the end it's not really me.  They ultimately have to find their safety and redemption the same way I did... In Christ.  I ache for them to find it.  I was awake with one of them last night and he was all nerves.  Crying and tight wound.  I wonder what he would have done if he would have known how shaky I felt too?  I made myself be calm and laid the blankets out on the big brown couch and cozied him in and wrapped my own gray soft blanket around my shaking shoulders and sat on the other couch and I told him I was just going to sit here and pray for him and give it to God.  After I quit praying out loud I asked him if he needed to pray.  He sighed big and said he was okay...

in the homemaker category this week.    I have two kids who had fever this week.   One kid broke a thumb and had to go through deep worry  because broken bones are HUGE for a ten year old. One kid got glasses for the first time.   One kid had stacks of homework all week, not because of laziness but because he's a highschooler. My laundry pile is huge.  The clean pile and the dirty pile. The family has been sorting through the piles to find clothes this week. I took the kids to the library this week and "had" to look through them  to approve them.  Hehe!  I can never put a book down.  It's a problem. I baked a batch of bread mixed in my 20 quart mixer...which means bread for days. I baked a quad batch of whoopie pies. I used my crock pot this week. On Wednesday I collected the stuff from the yard from our party on Saturday. I took the kids out to eat at Pizza Hut one evening  because my...

Eating at the Toast.  Perfect food and atmosphere at midday.   My parents came to see us in September and I'm just taking time to sit down and document it here.  It was a very good validating and reassuring time.  It had been three years since they visited here but even longer since they had been here to just see me without mixing in a reunion on top of it.  So I got to show them just my life and not host a reunion in the process.  I needed that vote of confidence in my life at just that time.   Abe's came up from Kansas City for a day.  Was wonderful having them here again!  I begged and pleaded and conquered.... Matt took us all to Lauritzen gardens.  It was beautiful.  Saying goodbye at the airport. Our lives are busy

     What's on my heart today.  People.  Always people.  I love people.   The ones who care. The ones who are hurting. The ones who can't get over their stuff and don't want to. The ones who have decided enough of the stuff and are digging deep and redeeming it. The young ones who have so much hope.   The young ones who want so much of life and  are finding life too real for them right now. The young ones who need a boundary but no one gives it. I hurt because I see all the people. And I want to fix it and make it better. I have a knowing. But I'm not snooping. And I'm not judging. I'm only aching. And who am I? I can't fix these things. When I reach out to touch those things. Am I reaching to tear down? Am I reaching to gain approval? Am I reaching because I really care? Am I reaching because I have all the answers? Am I reaching because I'm a control nut? Or what about reaching ...

Matt has been slowly getting this spot cleaned up for us.  It's the door we go in and out of the most.  And it was one big mud slide and ugly right in front of the door.  One Saturday in Spring I declared that I was sick of it and I was going to do something with it soon.  Matt took it and dreamed and worked to make something that I couldn't have ever done.  He's not satisfied with it but I'm very pleased with it.  I think it's perfect.  I love the imperfection of it.  Little spiritual lesson:  I think sometimes the imperfections bring out the beauty the best. Would we know God's grace if we were perfect?  Would we know Joy if we didn't know pain?  Even weeds have beauty.  Another little home improvement.  This bathroom is one of three in this house and it's well used and ugly.  So I painted it all white and bleached and scrubbed and recaulked.  Now I just need new drawer pulls and a new register cover....

It's almost Labor Day weekend and school is in it's second week.  I still haven't found a moment to breathe and find boredom or loneliness.  I hope to though.  Last week got completely filled up with canning and adjustments and all the life things.  So today is Monday and so far I've pretty much done nothing.  Except I went to the chiropractor and the library and took a short walk on Plum Creek Trail.  And ate lunch with Matt.  Now I'm home and ready to knock out all the Monday things.  But I won't .  Because there's no pressure.  And I've decided that clean and perfect is over rated.  Here's pictures of what we did the last while before school and then first day of school pictures.   I took Keagan and Mathias on a field trip to the state capital.  They were enthralled and so was I.  It's is a very beautiful building.  And the atmosphere of the place......It's a good experience.  All the b...